Highly Successful But Not in Love? Here’s Why and What to Do

by Janet Ong Zimmerman on 09/09/2014

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Are You a Highly Successful Woman?

If you’re a highly successful woman in your career, chances are, you’ve had to influence others, lead teams, develop strategies, implement tactics, manage projects, set schedules, negotiate for more time, control situations or meet deadlines.  This driven approach is about focusing on external conditions by affecting and motivating others.

Achieving this level of success doesn’t just fall into place and happen.  It takes a lot of hard work, energy and dedication.  It’s about doing and making things happen.  These masculine traits that work so well in your professional life unfortunately don’t transfer to the same kind of success in romantic love.

Greater Success Means More Masculine Energy

Did you know the more successful you are in your professional life, the more connected you are to masculine energy?  While there is nothing wrong with being connected to your masculinity, if you are looking for a deep and meaningful relationship with a masculine man, you will want to be more connected with your feminine essence in your love life.

Connecting with your feminine essence is more than skin deep – it’s more than the way you dress and the cosmetics you wear.  Being feminine isn’t about changing who you are to attract and keep a man.  It isn’t a weaker, subservient role than being masculine.  In a harmonious relationship, both the feminine and masculine energies create a harmonious and synergistic relationship

Since a highly successful woman spends lot of time at work using and being successful with masculine traits, it is understandable why these traits become her dominate way of being in her love life.  If you can relate, then you may have experienced confusion, frustration and disappointment when you’ve initiate communication and dates with a man only to have him back off.  Here’s what’s happening…

Connect Instead of Compete

Going after what you want in love can make it seem like you are competing instead of connecting with a man.  When it comes to love, a man doesn’t want to be with a woman who is a better man than him.  Despite societal advancements and women’s lib, a masculine man is still wired to pursue a woman.  If you tend to pursue a man (i.e. initiate, give too much, try to control, etc.), there is no space for him to pursue you.  You also seem desperate which pushes him further away.

Letting a man pursue you isn’t about playing games.  It’s about working with what is (i.e. the way men are wired) – connecting with your femininity that brings out a man’s desire to pursue you.  If the thought of being feminine conjures up images of being subservient and doing whatever a man wants.  Or if it seems like having to act like someone else just to get and keep a man, that’s not what I mean by being feminine.

Being feminine by staying true to who you are is what I’m talking about.  While your dominant traits may seem masculine, at your core, your feminine essence is waiting to be discovered.  This is like a woman who has never exercised and thinks she doesn’t have muscles.  Just because she can’t see her muscles doesn’t mean she doesn’t have them.  They are just hidden and will show up from lifting weights and doing cardio.

How to Do Less and Have More in Love

A highly successful woman is used to doing more and having more in her career.  In doing so, she misses the fact that this approach has the opposite effect in in love.  Have you noticed that the more you do in your love life, the less you have?  This is because doing more keeps the focus on what’s outside of you and prevents you from looking within.  The best and most direct route to true love is self-reflection and doing the work to change unsupportive habits and patterns to support you in having the love you desire.

When it comes to love, less is more.  The less you do, the more you will have.  This is because the less you do, the less pressure a guy feels from you initiating, forcing and trying to control things to work out a certain way.  You can do less by connecting with your feminine essence.

Being feminine is more about who you are being and less about what you are doing.  Connecting with your femininity is about tapping into your softer side and opening your heart.  To find success in your dating life or romantic relationship with a masculine man, relax and let him pursue you.  Connect with your feminine essence by responding more and initiating less, receiving more and not giving too much, and letting things happen naturally.  You will experience more ease and joy on your journey to love, and be highly successful in your love life.

Learn how connecting with your feminine essence inspires a man’s to appreciate, cherish and respect you in this eCourse: 9 Juicy Ways to Bring Out a Man’s Desire to Woo Me.

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