Practical wisdom about dating, courtship, and relationships to improve your love life.
Unwrap the deeper meaning of Valentine's Day and give yourself the gift of love.
Dear Successful Woman,
The true meaning of Valentine's Day goes beyond commercials and expectations of gifts, flowers, chocolates and jewelry. If we look beyond the commercialization, we find that Valentine's Day holds a deeper meaning.
Love and Accept Yourself Completely
Our society places much emphasis for someone special to be our Valentine. While there's nothing wrong with this, the better approach is to focus first on you. Until you can love and accept all of who you are, true love is elusive because deep down, you won't feel deserving of someone else's love. You'll be searching for your missing half not realizing that you're already complete. If you're like most women, you tend to be hard on yourself. You may even try to hide or change aspects of yourself. The truth is the more you love yourself, the more you can love someone else.
Instead of looking for someone else to complete you, complete yourself by loving and accepting yourself fully. Whether you're single, in a relationship, divorced or married, it's important that you love yourself first. The quality of your love life stems from how much or little you love yourself. Be your Valentine by writing a letter to "Dear Self".
Love Letter to "Dear Self"
Create the right mood and setting for writing your letter. Play expansive music that opens your heart. Light candles to create a relaxing environment. Allow enough time to write your letter in one sitting. Choose special stationery that reflects who you are, stationery that makes you feel good when you look at it. Consider including the following in your letter.
Things I love and adore about myself
My best qualities and traits
The physical, tangible and intangible aspects that are wonderful about me
What makes me successful
Things I appreciate about myself
What I'm passionate about
What my strengths are
What my core values are and how they've helped me in life
What my family loves about me
What my friends value about me
Write your letter in a positive and present tone. Don't analyze, judge or "but" what you write. Just let it flow. Feel the love as you're writing from your heart. After you've written your letter, read it and feel the wonderful feelings come up inside of you. To deepen to the process, visualize, feel and believe your love letter in the present moment. Read your letter from time to time as a way to imprint self love at a deeper level.
Self Love is the Way to True Love
Self love is the only way to a high quality love relationship. The quality of men and love relationships you've experienced is a direct result of the degree of love you have for yourself. Most of us only love the good sides of ourselves and wish we could disown the self-perceived bad sides. If you only love parts of yourself, you'll find yourself with men and in relationships that aren't satisfying. Once you do the inner work to love yourself completely, you'll have a wonderful and fulfilling love relationship beyond your dreams. Click here for a helpful article on loving and accepting all of who you are.
I wish you the true meaning of Valentine's Day.
Janet Ong Relationship Coach and Your Tango Expert
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Copyright Love for Successful Women, 2020.