Practical wisdom about dating, courtship, and relationships to improve your love life.
Ever been with a guy who says he doesn’t want a girlfriend, but acts like your boyfriend? If so, you’ve probably been confused by his mixed signals and wondered, “Why doesn’t he want me to be his girlfriend when we enjoy each other’s company and spend so much time together?” The answer is he has no reason and incentive to buy the cow when he’s getting the milk for free. In other words, when you give sex and the benefits of a relationship to a guy who doesn’t want a girlfriend, he doesn’t see the need to be your boyfriend.
What to do when a guy says he doesn’t want a girlfriend, but acts like your boyfriend
It’s hard to be objective when you’re in this situation because your heart is invested in him. However the repercussions are worse the longer you stay with this guy. From my experience, the only way to know if he will change his mind is to stop hanging out, hooking up and giving him relationship benefits. By doing this, he will either find someone else to hang out and hook up with or realize how much you mean to him and ask you to be his girlfriend. This latter possibility is the exception. Assume you are not the exception so that you stay strong. Don’t get sucked into having sex and giving him the benefits of a relationship.
Believe him when he tells you he doesn’t want a girlfriend, even if he’s acting like your boyfriend. If a guy wants to be your boyfriend, his words, behaviors and actions will match up in a positive way. You should never have to ask him why he won’t be your boyfriend. You are worthy of being with a better guy. Save yourself for the right guy who wants you to be his girlfriend.
Curious about a man’s perspective?
In Stephan Labossiere’s article, He Doesn’t Want A Girlfriend, But He Acts Like Your Boyfriend, he says, “I know many women may be saying “why can’t men just be more honest about what they want”. Technically the man in a situation like this has been honest. He told you from the get go he didn’t want a relationship. If you choose to entertain this man and it all ends in disappointment he still can say “well I told you I didn’t want a relationship”. The confusion comes from not understanding how many men operate.” Read the full article here.
Stephan Labossiere is a Certified Relationship Expert & Life Coach. He is the author of the book “How To Get A Married Woman To Have Sex With You…If You’re Her Husband”.
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Copyright Love for Successful Women, 2020.